I’ve officially made it to month 10 of pregnancy. After 9 months, my patience is wearing thin. I’ve turned to my friend google to try to figure out what has worked for others during this last 1-2 weeks of gestation, and continuing to work after my due date. I learned that most women who have time & energy to contribute to the noise of the internet at this stressful point of transition, are extremely priviledge. So, instead of saying how you can navigate this time, here are some guidelines for EVERYONE ELSE in our culture, on what they can do to not be a fucking asshole. And of course, take into consideration who you are dealing with. This is limited to my own experience, but you can taylor it to fit the woman you are dealing with.

What NOT to say to a past-due pregnant woman:

1. What? Still no baby?

2. You’re still here? (especially at work)

3. Here’s a horrible story about ceserian birth

4. Have you tried xyz to start labor?

5. Here’s what happened to my wife to start labor.

Remember, she is barely holding it together. This time is not about your curiosity, think before speaking.

Things you can say to a past-due woman:

1. “Here, I brought you ice cream.”

2. “Is there anything I can do for you today?”

3.  Best of all, offer some authentic encouragement, “I think you’ll really get a kick out of giving birth I would’ve loved to do it several more times but just didn’t need all those babies”

Stay strong Mamas!